Friday, September 30, 2011

10 Positive Words to Motivate You – Part 6 and Final

Positive words

This is the final article in this series. I think these words are the most important of all:
1.      Opportunity: You create your own opportunity. You are more likely to get what you want in life when you are prepared and ready. 

Opportunity dances with those already on the dance floor. ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr. 

2.      Optimism: It is the positive mental attitude of hopefulness and looking at the bright side of things. You can when you think you can.

Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. ~ Helen Keller 

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. ~ Winston Churchill  

3.      Patience: Success is about working patiently. Be willing to wait for a long time to enjoy the fruit of your success. Learn to enjoy what you do every day without thinking too much of the outcome.  Life, after all, is a journey.

Patience is necessary, and one cannot reap immediately where one has sown. 
~ Soren Kierkegaard 

4.      Preparation: Find out what you want in life, plan and organize in advance, take action and work your plan. 

I feel that luck is preparation meeting opportunity. ~ Oprah Winfrey  

5.      Persistence: Keep doing what you have planned to do when you know you are on the right track. Be determined to carry on despite setbacks and obstacles.

Success is almost totally dependent upon drive and persistence. The extra energy required to make another effort or try another approach is the secret of winning. 
~ Denis Waitley 

6.      Progress: To make progress in life is to learn new knowledge and do things differently.
 It's not about success, it's about progress. ~  Tony Robbins 

7.      Resilience: Do not fear failure, it is the stepping stone to realize your dreams

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently. 
~Henry Ford 

8.      Perseverance: True success is the combination of patience, persistence and resilience. It is about hard work over a long period of time. 

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. ~ Winston Churchill 

9.      Success:  To be successful is to take action and do what is useful to others. The more you give, the more successful you will be.

Action is the foundational key to all success. ~ Pablo Picasso 

Success is doing ordinary things extraordinarily well. ~Jim Rohn

10.  Trust: Trust yourself that you will do the right things. Trust is what you get from others when you do things right over time.
Self-trust is the first secret of success. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Related articles:
10 Positive Words to Motivate You – Part 5
10 Positive Words to Motivate You – Part 4
10 Positive Words to Motivate You - Part 3
10 Positive Words to Motivate You – Part 2
10 Positive Words to Motivate You – Part 1

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Are You One of the Lazy Americans?

Are You One of the Lazy Americans?

Last year, According to Joe Klein in an article, Road Trip Day 13: The Lazy American, when I asked why we were sliding, people blamed unfair competition from the Chinese, the loss of manufacturing jobs, the growth of the welfare state. This year, we’re blaming ourselves. I have heard the word “lazy” used at nearly every stop.

Are you one of the lazy Americans? Here are the things you can do to stay active and beat laziness:

Be active at home: Turn off the TV, the more you watch TV, the lazier you will be. Your body is not moving, your mind is not working and you are getting obese by drinking and eating snack food constantly. Be active and help in the household chores, do the washing up, get the garbage out, water the plants, mow the lawn, walk the dog and jog around. Be active and feel the energy in you. In the evening, help your children in their homework, talk to them and be close to them.

 • Be productive at work: You can be productive at work when you are active at home. Your active lifestyle promotes enthusiasm and eagerness to do what you need to do at the workplace. You will be energetic and others can see the positive difference in you.

 • Be an active learner: The other reason why you are lazy is that you are complacent. You are satisfied with what you are now. Change your mindset and seek continuous learning to move ahead. Learn new knowledge and make changes and do thing differently to seek improvement.

Be active socially: Be active and stay connected in your social circle. Opportunities are created through active connection with people. Go to them and get to know what is happening.

Be mentally active: Work your brain and be alert. Be innovative and resourceful at work by solving problems and finding better ways of getting things done. Be creative by writing articles, taking up painting or joining a pottery class.

 • Just do it: The most effective way to beat inertia and laziness is to act promptly. Develop a sense of urgency. Take the first step and you will be going on with the task at hand. Do not be overwhelmed, do one thing at a time mindfully. Pay attention and enjoy the process of getting a job done.

Be active physically and mentally is the best way to avoid being one of the lazy Americans.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Profit from the 7 Effective Ways of Classified Ads to Blog Productively

Classifed ads

 Classified ads are small. However, there are 7 ways to upgrade your classified ads so that they are more appealing to the eyes. Bloggers can learn a lot from the 7 effective ways of classified ads to attract attention:

 1. Larger font size: Classified ads employ larger font size to stand out a particular advertisement. As a blogger, you can do the same throughout an article or highlight certain words or paragraphs in your article. Larger font size is definitely easier to read. You will notice there are many articles with smaller font size and they are not user-friendly.

 2. Bold tag: Classified ads use blog tag to highlight telephone numbers and other important words. Likewise, bold text is an effective way to highlight keywords or emphasize certain words in an article.

 3. Bold header: The first three words of a classified ad are bold. However, you can pay extra and upgrade your ad to bold all the words in your headline to show prominence. Headline is the most important thing of an article. It is always bold with a much larger font.

 4. Color background: It is another good way to differentiate from other ads by using a color background like this. When you do the same to your article to certain words or a particular passage, it is surely eye-catching. 

 5. Color liners: It is yet another effective way for a classified ad to use bright color text to arrest the attention of readers. Similar tactics can be employed in an article to spotlight certain words or an important paragraph. 

 6. Image/logo: A classified ad with a picture or logo is more attractive than one without. Similarly, an attractive image relevant to the subject matter of the article will definitely attract more attention from readers.

 7. Spacing: An ad requires a larger space will cost more, but it is easier to get noticed and

 read. When your lengthy article is written in double spacing, words are not cramped and

 crowded together. It is definitely easier to read and digest.

 Are you taking advantage of the effective ways of classified ads?

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

31 Ways to Enjoy the Simple Pleasures Every Day

Image result for simple pleasures images
Life can be simple but enjoyable every day. Happiness is to be found in simple things you do. The secret is to be aware and appreciative of what you are doing. Here are some of the simple pleasures in life:

1. Feel good about yourself when you are up and about in the morning.

2. A simple breakfast of instant mee plus a cup of coffee.

3. Working without being interrupted and disturbed.

4. Say thank you to the cashier at the check-out counter and you are responded with a smile.

5. A nap on a Sunday afternoon.

6. Jog around the field in the evening.

7. Reading an uplifting article.

 8. Listening to your favorite songs while you get caught in a traffic jam.

9. Licking your ice-cream cone on a hot Sunday afternoon at the mall.

10. Munching a bar of dark chocolate and watch your favorite movie at home.

11. A free flow of ideas when you are writing your article.

12. Admiring the big, tall, green trees while you are strolling on the park.

13. Looking forward to welcoming a new day when you wake up early in the morning.

14. Munching your favorite biscuit and enjoying your coffee during your afternoon tea break.

15. A good read before you hit the bed.

 16. Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain while you are in bed.

17. Help your child in her homework in the evening.

18. Looking at the cruising boat on the river while the breeze is pampering your face.

 19. Playing with your pet.

20. Smell the freshness of the air after the rain.

21. Feel the warmth of the sunshine in the morning.

22. Reading some positive comments on your blog.

 23. Getting things done calmly with peace of mind.

24. Talking over Skype with your son when he is away from home.

25. Did all that you wanted to do in your to-do list for the day.

26. Feel the sea breeze and listen to the waves rushing to the shore.

27. A simple dinner of noodles with fried eggs with family members.

28. Checking my stats on the Net in the morning.

29. Do Tai Chi after waking up.

30. Clear the clutter on my desk.

31. Watch the fish swimming in the aquarium.

Please add some more to this list.

Monday, September 26, 2011

7 Positive Attitudes to Work Productively

Positive attitude

Our attitudes control our lives. Attitudes are a secret power working twenty-four hours a day, for good or bad. It is of paramount importance that we know how to harness and control this great force. ~ Irving Berlin

 A positive attitude is rooted in the positive thoughts in your mind. It is the most effective, successful and the right way to work productively.

 1. Be committed: Are you enthusiastic about your work? Are you interested in what you do? Are you energetic at work? These are positive signs that you are determined to perform your best.

 2. Learn from mistakes: Be receptive to constructive criticism and be willing to take responsibility for your own mistakes. The most important thing is to learn from mistakes and be wiser. A positive attitude is not to give excuses or blame others when things are not working out right.

 3. Evaluate: Instead of calling it a day, take stock of your performance at the end of each day. Think of setbacks you have encountered and see how you can get things done in a better way.

 4. Go for excellence: You take pride in what you do because you work with your heart. You go for excellence in each task you undertake. Your attitude is to exceed expectations.

 5. A learning attitude: Be interested to renew your knowledge and learn new things. This is the way to stay competent and competitive. Knowledge gives you the power to perform effectively.

 6. Adopt a problem-solving attitude: Instead of complaining, you react to problems positively. Solving problems sharpen and promote your creativity and enhance your skills at work, the more problems you are able to solve the more confident you will be. You create value and authority for yourself at the workplace.

 7. Uphold professionalism: You do what is right without fear or favor. You want to be respected, trusted and also to protect your reputation and image.

 It is your attitude, not your aptitude, that determines your altitude. ~ Zig Ziglar

Saturday, September 24, 2011

10 Effective Ways to Enjoy What You Do Every Day

Enjoy what you do every day

Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now. Don't wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future. Think how really precious is the time you have to spend, whether it's at work or with your family. Every minute should be enjoyed and savored. ~Earl Nightingale

Your daily life is filled with activities. How much of the things do you actually enjoy doing? You can enjoy all of the things that your do every day in 10 positive and effective ways:   

1.      Do your best: You heart is able to tell you if you are enjoying what you do. When you are reluctant to do your best, it means you are not happy in doing it. Change your mindset and do the best you can.  When you do something with your best intentions, you will not only enjoy doing it, you will also do a better job. You are what you do. Build the trust of others in what you do and feel good that others can count on you.

2.      Have fun: When it is time to unwind and relax, are you able to do so? Are you still thinking about your work and worrying about it? Loosen up and indulge in your leisure moment fully, freely and let go of everything else. This is the only way to enjoy what you do and have fun.

3.      Attention: Paying attention to what you do is a positive sign that you are interested in the task at hand and you indeed enjoy doing it. When you have to get a job done, develop an interest in it so that you will enjoy doing it.   

4.      Intentions: You will be more than just enjoying what you do; you are excited and enthusiastic about it because you are working on achieving your goals and realizing your dreams. You will enjoy it even more when what you do is beneficial to others.

5.      Avoid distractions: The best way to do your work and enjoy it is to do it without being interrupted and disturbed. Find a time slot when you can get the most important and difficult job done in one go.

6.      Take pride in what you do: Be proud of what you do and happy to showcase your work because you do it with your heart. Every piece of your work is a masterpiece to you.
7.        Be responsible: You take responsibility in what you do. You do your work painstakingly and you enjoy what you do because you want to do a good job.  You want to protect your reputation and build a trusted brand for yourself.

The secret of joy in work is contained in one word - excellence. To know how to do something well is to enjoy it. ~Pearl  S. Buck

8.      Learn, change and improve: One exciting way to enjoy what you do is to learn and discover more effective ways of doing things. You will be delighted and motivated to do the same job quicker and easier.   

9.      Do a thorough job: Helping out in household chores can be a boring job, but it is not necessary to be so. Think positively of what you do and be happy in doing it. The reason is not hard to find.  If you are not doing a good job by washing thoroughly the pots and pans that you are using, will you be pleased with the state of cleanliness of your kitchen utensils? You are going to use them eventually. Are you going to compromise the health of your household members? 

10.  Be here and now: One effective way to enjoy what you do is to be present. When your mind is not thinking of something else, you are able to get into the flow of what you do.
The most important in life is to find joy in what you do every day.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Jillian Michaels Interviews Rita Wilson on Her Career and Her Family

Rita Wilson

This is a guest post by Kathleen Chu. The original source of this article is at Everyday Health.

Jillian spent time with actress, producer, and writer Rita Wilson for an exclusive, intimate interview on getting started in acting, her proudest moments, and her big new gig, as editor-at-large for Huff/Post 50.

Rita Wilson is a beloved gem of a woman who has managed a healthy, celebrated marriage for over 20 years in a town that loves to attack happiness. She’s a mom of four beautiful kids who all adore her. She’s a revered producer, celebrated actress on Broadway and the silver screen, dedicated philanthropist, an accomplished writer who contributes to such power publications as Harper's Bazaar and the Huffington Post, where she's an editor-at-large. She wears so many hats it’s staggering, but the fact that she wears them all so well is what truly bowls me over. For all those reasons I have found her to be deeply impassioned, influential, and motivating, which is why I set my sights on interviewing her.
What annoys the hell out of me about articles, as the writer and the subject, is that there is no way to interpret tone. So much of Rita’s charisma and warmth is in her tone and I hate that you’re missing that, so let me set it for you. Throughout this interview I could feel her smiling through the phone. There’s a steady unwavering in her tone of speech that conveys patience and strength. The rhythms of her sentences are rife with self-deprecating chuckles as well as long introspective pauses, which allow her to craft her thoughts into potent, impactful messages.
And on that note, let’s begin.

Jillian Michaels: Given all that you have accomplished in your life, I wanted to start out by getting a little background on how you came into all these roles you play personally and professionally, found your passion, and so forth? In essence, give us a little insight into the making of a powerhouse.
Rita Wilson: Awww… thank you. Well, I am very proud to be the child of immigrants. I am a first-generation American. My mom is Greek, and my dad, who passed away about a year and a half ago, was Bulgarian. My parents actually met in New York after the war and then moved to Los Angeles after getting married.
I learned from my parents, particularly my dad, a great work ethic. He worked so incredibly hard despite not knowing how to speak English, coming to this country with nothing. He was a bartender, but managed to buy a home and support our entire family without any debt. I learned from him you work hard. You don’t buy anything you can’t afford. Take care of the people who take care of you.
JM: What age were you when you thought to yourself, I want to be an actress, and why? It seems out of the blue given your background.
RW: It was completely out of the blue. The only thing about it that made sense is that when my parents moved to the States, they moved to Hollywood because my mom’s sister lived out here. When I was 14, it was my very first day of high school, Hollywood High School. I was walking to one of my classes and these adults asked if they could take pictures of me. I knew that it was okay because they were there with the school's principal. So I said “all right.” They took pictures of me, and it turned out those were all people from Harper's Bazaar magazine, which is so ironic because I write for them now. Turns out, they were looking to cast real people mixed with models in an issue they were doing to celebrate 18-year-olds getting to vote.
JM: So this all started as serendipity?
RW: Yeah, total serendipity. When I realized I could do it, I thought, “Oh! This is cool!” Then Nina Blanchard [modeling agency] signed me and I started modeling. Now, in high school, I was also a cheerleader, and a girlfriend of mine had an audition to play a cheerleader on The Brady Bunch. She said to me, “Listen I don’t know how to cheer, I’m really bad at it. Would you teach me?” So I said, “Sure,” and I taught her. Then she asked me to come with her to the audition. So I did, and I was sitting in the waiting room and we were practicing cheers. It turns out there were two parts. The casting people came out and said to me “Are you here to audition?” I said "No." They said, "Do you want to audition?” and I said “Okay.” So I didn’t get her part, but I got this smaller part –
JM: (rudely interrupting) Pat Conway! (the name of the character Rita played). Yes, I have seen this episode of The Brady Bunch. I still love that show.
RW: Yes, Pat Conway! Which got me my SAG card, making me a member of the Screen Actors Guild, which meant that now I could do commercials. I got my first commercial on my 18th birthday, and it was for Peter Pan Peanut Butter. And from there I got another agent and just started doing a lot of TV work. It was great. I loved it. But up till this point I had never had any formal training.
JM: So this really and truly started out as fate for you. It honestly seems that you were literally guided into this career. Given that, what part do you think fate plays into our ability to find our true calling?
RW: Uh! I think about that all the time, Jillian. I always like to ask people, “What’s the thing that you loved to do as a kid?” because I think whatever you loved to do as a kid you should probably be doing as an adult. We are unfiltered and unfettered at that age, and you do something because you love doing it. When I think back on that, for me it was always music and singing.
While I was acting and modeling I still had regular jobs, and one of them was working as a ticket-taker at the Universal Amphitheater, so I could watch the concerts. And everybody came through there at that time. It was the '70s, so I saw Joni Mitchell, Linda Ronstadt, Fleetwood Mac — I mean you name it, I saw them. I used to look up at the stage and just ache. I thought, “I want to do that! How do you get up there?” But I wasn’t in a band and I didn’t play an instrument. I had no clue at all how to pursue it.
So… I don’t question where my path led me, because I went with the flow. I thought, “I love what I am doing and I am good at it.” So I stuck with it. But I couldn’t… didn’t know how to break into the music thing. I just didn’t know how to do that.
Jillian Michaels: It seems at times fate knocks on people's door and they are too afraid to pursue it. So I wonder, what is it about you that didn’t fall prey to intimidation by all this? What do you think it was from your background, or what existed intrinsically inside of you, that allowed you to put yourself out there in these terrifying ways?
Rita Wilson: Gosh, I recognized that it was an opportunity. I get instincts about things and I felt like I could do this. And I realized there was no good reason for me not to do it.
JM: Gut instinct and faith in your abilities. Seems so simple, but it really is truly profound when you are able to understand those concepts and utilize their powers.
RW: And my parents never put in my mind that I couldn’t do something, so they didn’t inhibit me at all. I think a lot of people have parents who say “You can’t do that” or “You have to do this.” They have their own agenda for their kids. My parents didn’t really have that for me. They were like, “Do it if it’s good for you.”
JM: So back to our story…
RW: Well, at about 19 I was about to leave for Paris to model, but before I did I’d heard of this really great acting teacher named Charles Conrad. But there were no openings, so of course I went to Paris. I called home every couple of weeks — these were the days before cell phones — to check in, and I was told there was an opening in Charles’ class. I flew straight home and got into that class, and it was my first time understanding that there was a craft in acting. It wasn’t just say these lines and walk over here.
I did that for a while, but what led me to the next really cool adventure was when I got cast in a play called Vanities. It was about these three best friends who grew up in the South. One day. the director said, “You seem to be really comfortable on the stage. You should do more theater.” So I got applications to RADA (the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art), LAMDA (the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Arts), and Julliard. I auditioned for all of them and got accepted to LAMDA, so I went. Remember that I had been doing a lot of commercials up until this point, so I was able to pay my tuition and support myself while I was studying there.
That whole experience introduced me to my love of theater, which is why I’m involved with the Shakespeare Center [in Los Angeles].
JM: Right! This is one of you charities, correct?
RW: Yes. It’s an incredible organization that has a program called Willpower to Youth that’s been adopted by the U.S. Department of Justice for gang reduction. It teaches children Shakespeare to keep them off the streets. It gives them a place to go after school, keeps them busy, and makes them less vulnerable to gangs. They create their own plays, with their own words, based on their own experiences, using a Shakespeare template.
JM: The heights you have reached and the courageous directions you have gone in your career are incredible — especially considering you were the child of immigrants who got her start on The Brady Bunch. Seemingly you have been so open and brave throughout the course of your life. I can’t help wonder if there was ever a time you weren’t?
RW: I think the thing that has inhibited me most in my life has been the belief that you have to be naturally good at something, as though working at it wasn’t enough.
JM: So you’re saying you felt you had to be perfect at it from go?
RW: Yes.
JM: I think so many people feel that way and it can really be paralyzing because if you aren’t instantly amazing — and really none of us are — it can seem devastating to our self-esteem, and no one wants to feel that. So how would you recommend someone overcome this fear?
RW: When facing any fear there’s always some element of sacrifice and giving up of some comfort. I have never had a problem doing that. So looking back I would say be bold. Keep trying. Let go of worrying about what others think.

Jillian Michaels: Switching gears here, I’m curious, of all the roles you play in the spectrum of your life (as a person, not an actress), which is most important to you.
Rita Wilson: Well, of course, I would say being a mother. Family always comes first.
Professionally I have the most fun and feel most myself when I am performing live or when I am writing.
JM: Why?
RW: Because with writing it’s completely your voice. There is a Joan Didion quote that I love: "I write entirely to find out what I'm thinking, what I'm looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear." Writing is a rediscovery of my experiences, in a good way, with my opinion attached to it. As for performing live, it’s a feeling of being naked. You are totally exposed, without any elements that might alter what people believe in that moment. There’s purity to it.
JM: Of all the parts you have played as an actress, which part did you relate to the most and why?
RW: First, I really, really, really loved the scene that I did in Sleepless in Seattle, where the character talks about the movie An Affair To Remember. And Nora (Ephron, the director of the film)… I don’t know… we just clicked. When someone really believes in you, you’re open and free to be uninhibited. She totally empowered me to be this character and I loved it because it was the first time I’d ever had this experience. She was also the first person who supported my writing and guided me through that process, so I love her very much for that.
The second would be when I did Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and The Good Wife earlier this year. I went to my agents and I said, “If I play one more warm, understanding mother, sister, wife, daughter, I think I’m gonna puke. You have got to find me some crazy-ass bitches.” And that’s when they found me the roles on Law & Order and The Good Wife. I was completely thrilled. I felt liberated. To play a character that is nothing like who you are as a person is amazingly fun.
JM: What is your proudest moment?
RW: You have to separate them. You can’t only say family and leave out the ones that have to do with work. I'm very proud of my marriage and my kids, and I'm proud of having produced My Big Fat Greek Wedding.
JM: Demanding room for personal and professional life! I’ll be sure and note that. Go on.
RW: As a parent I would have to say anything where you can see that what you’ve done as a parent has impacted them positively. Seeing your children become really lovely young adults and human beings is overwhelming in some ways.
Professionally, I would say the most exciting and most informative thing was finding My Big Fat Greek Wedding, allowing Nia Vardalos to star in it, and having it become the success that it did against all odds. It really validated my belief that good people can succeed. I like to believe that if you do the right thing you succeed because we have all seen the opposite thing happen. And I was so glad that it happened that way.
JM: It seems like another part of your success is that you are very in touch — in touch with your emotions and what’s going on culturally. You tap in and have the confidence to believe in your vision. You’ve shown that time and time again in your work. Whether it’s producing My Big Fat Greek Wedding, starring in Chicago on Broadway, or in your role as a wife and a mother.
RW: I do trust my instincts. Do I listen to them all the time? No.
JM: Ah, You’ve brought me to my next question. What do you regret and what would you do differently if you could go back in time?
RW: Recently there was an instinct about a person. Other people talked me out of my instincts, and I went with what they thought I should be doing and it ended up being a disaster.
JM: We’ve all done that. I know I’ve done that. And God knows I paid for it as well.
RW: Do you know Gavin de Becker? He’s an amazing author who wrote this book called The Gift Of Fear. It’s all about trusting your instincts. He says your instinct is like a muscle that needs to be exercised, and the more you use it the stronger it gets. I totally believe that. Sometimes life gets in the way, you get busy. I personally get messed up when I think, “Well, those people must know more than I do about this subject. Who am I to say no to this or yes to that? They clearly know more than I do here.” Now I know that’s really not true.
JM: So do you think in a way that painful incident was a blessing because now you won’t allow insecurity to sabotage your instinct?
RW: Yes.
Jillian Michaels: Okay, this next one is gonna be tough for you, buddy, but I want you to wax poetic about yourself. What are the qualities you like best about you?
Rita Wilson: The things I like in other people — a sense of humor, passion, people who do the right thing.
JM: Is there a quality that you don’t like about yourself that you wish you could change?
RW: Hmmm… the reason I am pausing is because there are so many (erupting into laughter). I wish I was a better delegator. I wish I could recognize more easily what’s important and not important in a given situation.
JM: So, in essence, you wanna be able to give up some control?
RW: Duh! Winning!
JM: Why do you think that’s been so hard for you?
RW: I’ve been on my own for such a long time, or rather, not alone, but making big decisions for myself at a young age. Taking care of myself. Helping out my family. I just feel like I’m that person who does that.
JM: Who care takes?
RW: Exactly. It’s sorta like my role, in a way, and with anything in life you have to want to change — which I do. With some things, I believe we need a smooth transition. This one of those things for me. Yet I’m a big believer in being scared to death because you can really grow when you're put in a circumstance where you’re deeply challenged. I felt that way when I did Chicago on Broadway.
JM: You keep leading me to my next question. I know that was a huge dream of yours. What advice would you give to someone who is struggling with making their dreams come true?
RW: You have to get over the self-consciousness of what people think. For me, that is the No. 1 thing, because that will trap you. That voice in your head that says, “You can’t do this. Are you insane? There are people who have been doing this for years. Who do you think you are?" (makes the sound of a tape recorder spooling on fast forward) We put imaginary limits on ourselves that are destructive, and we should never allow that voice to play a part in the situation. If you really have a passion for something, then just do it. Find a way to do it!
Before I did Chicago I started taking a watercolor class. I’d always wanted to learn how to do it. I’m not very good at it, but I love the entire process. So I was taking this class once a week. I knew nothing before I started, and every week I would take this class and guess what… after five years of taking the class, you don’t get worse, you get better. If you sit in your house and you do nothing, then you'll do nothing. But if you get out and do something, then you’ll do something.
JM: Huff/Post 50: What is this? This is all you, right?
RW: Arianna (Huffington) approached me with this. It sounded really fun because it’s dealing with all the areas that I love in terms of boomers and what we are dealing with as a generation. Our generation is really interesting and curious and vibrant. So I felt it would be a really fun project to explore.
JM: And what do you hope the boomers will take away from it?
RW: Hopefully it will be a place where boomers can come to find topics of discussion for things they might be experiencing. For example, an individual in our generation might be becoming a grandparent at 54, or they could be raising 4-year-olds. I’m interested in talking about taking care of elderly parents. Many of us have found ourselves in the position of parenting our parents. I’m interested in exploring finances, politics, business… There’s also a particular area of interest to me, which is reinvention. You may have accomplished all you need to accomplish and yet you’re still young, with so many good years ahead of you. How do you want to spend that time? What do you want to do? I want to explore all these things.
JM: And how are you reinventing yourself at this time in your life?
RW: I don’t like to talk about things until they are done.
JM: But you’re currently doing it! Why does it have to be “done” to mention? (Yes, I’m privy to some inside information.)
RW: I’m not touching this one yet.
JM: Come on, at least allude to it!
RW: No. You don’t need to talk about it. It’s not that I don’t want to open up fully. I find that it’s my own personal rule that I don’t talk about things before they are happening.
JM: Lord. Okay, fine. I’m only letting you out of this because you are one of my most impressive friends and I don’t want you to not talk to me again. And just the fact that you are always reinventing yourself is truly inspirational. So then, last question, buddy: What is the best advice you can provide as a wife, mother, and career woman to our readers?
RW: As a wife? That’s tough. I really feel that it’s specific to the relationship. I don’t want to generalize any advice like, “Make sure you laugh a lot,” because that’s one of the things that I always say Tom [Hanks, Wilson's husband] and I do. Because if someone doesn’t have that with somebody, yet they have a really solid marriage, I wouldn’t want them to question it. They may have something else that binds them. Don’t you think that’s kind of specific?
JM: I do get that, but I also think there’s a respect that’s inherent in watching you two together. You guys respect each other so much. It seems no matter where the other one is, no matter what journey you’re on independently, you guys respect each other and everything the other person is going through.
RW: Yes. That’s true. We do respect each other very much. And of course, I want to be married to him. I love him.
JM: So then love and respect! Is offering advice to a mother equally specific?
RW: My mom always said to me, “Your kids teach you.” I think that’s very true and I’ve always interpreted that to mean you you’ve got to be a good listener. Not just to your children’s words, but to who they are. Allow them to be who they are without imposing any sort of agenda or desire on to them. Let them find their own way, their own journey, and don’t try to control that.
JM: And for the career woman?
RW: Trust your gut — about everything. And communicate what it is you want at all times. Don’t think that people can read your mind.
JM: Now woman to woman — what’s your parting shot to the readers?
RW: Women can accomplish anything they set their minds to. We have lived in a world that’s been predominantly run by males for a very long time. And in it would be nice to see a shift where we allow a woman’s voice and a woman’s take on things. We can’t just go around having wars and killing people left and right. Women have to trust their voice, trust their individual power and assert themselves in their own unique ways.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

12 Effective Ways to Communicate Productively


Your ability to communicate is an important tool in your pursuit of your goals, whether it is with your family, your co-workers or your clients and customers. ~ Les Brown

There are 12 simple ways to communicate effectively and get things done, obtain what you want in life and gain the respect of others:

1. Ask for it: Do not be afraid to ask for what you want. You have to tell others clearly what you really want because others cannot read your mind. You may not get it, but without asking, you don’t stand a chance. It is even more so that you need to ask for your pay raise which you think you deserve it. Do not keep inside your heart and regret later that you have not taken the courage to ask for what you want.

2. Acknowledge: Smile and greet people you meet. Say thank you to people who have served you. Write a thank-you note when someone has done something you have requested for. The most important thing is to acknowledge.

3. Clarify: When you are in doubt, seek clarification. Do not assume but be sure of what you are supposed to do. Do it once and for all.

4. Repeat: When you are taking an order, it is a good practice to repeat and confirm the order so that you get things done correctly the first time. You gain the respect of others because you are efficient and you don’t waste valuable time to do things all over again because you have got the wrong message.

5. Get to know: Do not be ashamed to ask when you do not know. How are you going to learn if you do not ask? When you don’t ask, it is assumed that you know and you are expected to get things done. When it is not done accordingly, you are only to be blamed.

6. Seek permission: Always seek consent to do something when you are not sure. It is also out of politeness that you ask for permission. People are delighted when you acknowledge and respect their presence.

7. Obtain feedback: It is good to ask for the opinion of others about your work. The only way to improve is to listen to constructive criticism and make changes for the better.

8. Admission: It takes great courage to admit that you are wrong. When you do so without giving excuses, you gain the respect of others. After all, to err is human.

9. To apologize: When you have done wrong to someone, the best thing you can do is to say sorry and ask for forgiveness because it is done without intention.

10. To motivate: Say a few kind words, provide positive feedback and offer constructive criticism to encourage and motivate others on the journey of life. You boost their confidence and they will try harder in what they do.

11. To console: Show your concern and offer sympathy and provide comfort when someone is in grief. This is the way to show your concerns for others.

12. To rejoice: Share and celebrate the success of others. Congratulate them and wish them all the best in what they do. You are happy because they are.

Communicate, communicate, and then communicate some more. ~Bob Nelson

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

7 Reasons to Stop Smoking

It is reported in the newspaper that eight in 10 men who smoke may end up having sexual problems, according to a doctor who performs clinical evaluation on male fertility. Smokers are hurting not only themselves seriously but those people around them as well. Here are the seven deadly sins of smokers:

 1. Health: It is confirmed that smoking is the leading cause of cancer and there are many other health-related problems beside sexual impotence. Smoking weakens your immune system and you are exposed to all kinds of illnesses.

2. Pollute office and home: In an enclosed environment, especially where the place is air-conditioned, smokers create the worst havoc. The air is not only polluted, there is a foul smile lingering about in the air. They, because of their urge to smoke, ignore the no-smoking sign and the health and well-being of others. It is the same thing at home, where your loved ones are adversely affected. They have to put up with their spouse’s selfish smoking habit and to also to tolerate inhaling second-hand smoke.

3. A dirty habit: Smokers have the dirtiest habit around. Besides polluting the air, cigarette ash and cigarette butts are everywhere. Ashtrays do not seem to serve the purpose. The worst offenders are those working in catering outlets. They smoke while working. Their behavior pisses you off.

4. Non-smokers are affected: Non-smokers are the worst victims. They are constantly inhaling the second-hand smoke. Smokers have a whale of a time at the expense of other people’s health. They are the most inconsiderate people in the world.

5. Fire hazard: When you think smoking is only affecting people’s health adversely. Think again. A smoker may smoke while lying on bed and without realizing, the person falls asleep while the cigarette in their hand is still burning. You can imagine the disastrous consequences.

6. A costly habit: Every year during budget time more tax is slapped onto cigarettes. It is actually to discourage the public from smoking. I wonder it is working, for all I know it is one of the most expensive bad habits besides gambling.

7. A burden for healthcare cost: Smokers cost the country to shoulder heavy medical expenses. It is a drain of a country‘s financial resources which could be put to better use.

Are you a smoker? Quit now for the sake of everyone’s well-being.
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